Triumph and Doom
by Beth Nottingham
Summary: Since there's no "Aesop's Fables" category, this is under "Mythology." Full Metal Panic does The Travelers and the Purse, by Aesop. Rated "T" for Kurtz... being Kurtz XD. Oneshot. Written for a school assignment, posted for fun.


**Hello again! I wrote this for a school assignment; it's a crossover between**_** Full Metal Panic**_** and **_**The Travelers and the Purse**_**, by Aesop. It's rated "T" for Kurtz's blatant perversion. I'm just posting for the heck of it, so read and enjoy, or if it's not your cup of tea, feel free to go find a story that's more to your liking.**

Triumph and Doom

By: Beth Nottingham

One week in early summer, Kaname, Kyoko and Rin all decided to go on vacation together. Naturally, since Kaname was going, Sosuke and his team of Melissa and Kurtz accompanied her. Naturally, as Rin was also going, her family's yakuza gang also sent some representatives to ensure her safety. Mr. Shibada, who was more or less the leader of the syndicate's men, quickly struck up an amicable friendship with Sgt. Weber.

While the girls swam and played and split watermelons with enthusiastic gusto, the various protectors meandered across the beach, weapons hidden and faces placid, as though they were merely tourists who happened to take an interest in the other vacationers. When the ladies returned to the rented summer house for dinner and card games, the guards patrolled the perimeter of the property, hidden beneath the shadows of the towering trees. It was after the girls had gone to bed, however, that the trouble began.

Although he had already been chastised by Mao about the relative ethics of going through his client's things, Kurtz simply could not resist taking a peek in the girls' luggage in the hopes that some lonely panty would have been carelessly abandoned, waiting for him to seek it out. Imagine his surprise and glee therefore, when he opened up an ordinary-looking book which turned out to be a photo album. It was _Kyoko's Super Secret Special Summer Memories Edition_, complete with a veritable wardrobe of bikinis, and even a few of the girls in the bath!

As Kurtz prepared to steal away with his precious trophy, he heard the sound of heavy footsteps. After considering for a moment, he relaxed. They were certainly male, by the weight of them, and Sosuke walked with a much more even gate. It was most likely his new yakuza friend, and when the door slid open, he was confronted—as he had anticipated—by the bald pate and ruddy face of Mr. Shibada.

"What've you got there?" the man asked, gesturing at the book clutched in Kurtz's hand, which was sweaty and trembling with excitement.

"They're pictures," he replied, rifling through the pages where Shibada could see him vaunt his prize.

"Ooooh!" The yakuza man exclaimed, lunging forward, "what good luck for us, eh?" Kurtz scowled and drew back, overcome with possessive jealousy for his finding.

"What good luck for _me_," he corrected stiffly. "I found them; they're mine!"

"Us!" Shibada roared, making a grab for the book.

"Me!" Kurtz snapped, holding it out of his reach.

The two were about to start fighting in earnest when suddenly Shibada held up a cautionary hand.

"Whose footsteps are those?" he mused as a pair of feet tramped down the hall towards the room where the luggage was being stored. Kurtz listened for a moment, and then gulped, his eyes roving around the room, which had only one door.

"That long stride, those determined steps…" Kurtz whispered, his ears sending warning signals to his brain, which was much too frightened to process them.

"We're screwed," he gulped as Mao's feet came level with the door.

"Nope," Shibada growled quietly, slipping out of the window and onto the roof. "_You're_ screwed, remember?"

As the door slid open and a familiar and terrifying voice demanded to know _who or what in heaven's name was making such a racket_, Kurtz realized that he could not very well expect anyone to share in his doom if he did not share with them his triumph.

**Sigh. He'll never learn, will he?**

**Reviews make me happy!**

**Pointless flames will be lent to Mao to use on Kurtz!**

**Kurtz: Hey! Why're you picking on me?**

**Me: 'Cause you're just so easy to pick on! :)**


End file.
